It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize