As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Randomize
