Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
my poor anus
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
