Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
