dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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