We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize