part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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