accomplished twins. life is a go
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
where are you?
Hypothermia
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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