i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
