i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
