u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Please, let me fuck your mom
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
