she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
