barbara walters just said penis...
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
