At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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