Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
