That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Barsexuality is the new black.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
