so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
