Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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