Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
