Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We talked him into tasing himself.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
