I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
