Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
