I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
