please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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