How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
