DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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