week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
