Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
