Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
