I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
id be glad to
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
We are two peas in an std pod
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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