garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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