i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
