I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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