is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
