dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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