Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
