Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Woke up backwards on a recliner
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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