mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
