after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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