Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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