I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Man, jail baloney is awful.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
