and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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