you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
