Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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