cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
