I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
