I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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