Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
