don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
