She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
He is an equal opportunity slut.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
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