What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
